Category: Joke Board
Top ten calls on Al Gore's answering machine
"Hi, Mandy from The Cheesecake Factory. You left your credit card"
"George W. Bush here. Congratulations on your Latin Grammy"
"It's Larry from Toyota. This global warming paranoia is great for business"
"Put on Letterman. Some idiot is going to jump over interns"
"This is Hillary. If you run for president, I'll snap your neck"
"It's Jets coach Eric Mangini. Can you play quarterback?"
"Ann Coulter here. Any way we can blame global warming on the Jews?"
"I'm calling from the EPA. Turns out there is no global warming; You're just sweating because you're getting fat"
"This is Jimmy Carter. Want to use our medals to score some babes?"
"It's Cheney. Watch your back, Jack"
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Top Ten Signs There's A Ghost In The White House
White House staffers have sensed a cold presence that's not Condoleeza
Rattling chains and agonized screams make the place sound like Gitmo
Someone's been reading the intelligence memos
Mysterious force keeps pulling Secretary of the Interior Dirk Kempthorne's pants down
Bush looks scared even when he's not looking at poll numbers
Halliburton has offered a $3 billion contract to the Ghost Whisperer
Medical documentation proves Cheney's been dead since '96
Actually, with Bush on vacation every two weeks, it's like having a ghost in the White House -- am I right, America?
Laura saw Saddam Hussein wearing underpants and eating Doritos
Mysterious banging and moaning noises in Oval Office, but Bubba ain't there
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Top Ten Questions President Bush Asked The Dalai Lama
"What is that, some kind of Halloween get up?"
"Is there a peaceful way for me to bomb Iran back to the stone age?"
"I got one for you -- why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?"
"Where's Mrs. Lama?"
"Are you that Japanese guy my dad threw up on?"
"Is it true yoga is the new oil?"
"What the hell is happening on 'Lost'?"
"How's business in Dollywood?"
"Have you ever met Dr. Phil?"
"I know your cousin Barack O'Lama"
Bob
ROFLMAO These are hilarious. I hate to admit it, but these are better than some of my lists.
hahahaha bob! nice nice nice! good job.
Nice dude.